Top 5 reasons I’m glad school is back in session.

Christmas break is over and Avery is back on the school bus.  Hallelujah!  I love the child and to be quite honest I have really enjoyed the extra time we’ve been able to spend together but it will be nice to get a little bit of structure back into the household.  As you may already know, my kids are going a little bit stir crazy and need some ‘normal’ injected into their days.  And quite frankly, so does their mother. 

The desperate need for normalcy aside, there are actually other reasons I am rejoicing over the start of a school day.  Allow me to share a few of them with you.

1) I am tired of sleeping in.  You’re thinking, Mindy, surely you jest!  But I’m dead serious here, folks.  Initially, when Christmas break started I told myself I would allow a couple of  “sleep-in” mornings.  Tops.  The rest of the mornings I would take advantage of a quiet household by waking up, getting my workout in, reading the paper over a cup of coffee and savoring the beauty of an early morning.  Problem.  I have done none of those things.  In fact, I don’t even subscribe to the newspaper, so, why I even set that as a goal is beyond me.  The workouts have been happening but not in the Zen-like atmosphere I was planning.  Have you ever tried to get your ’Jane Fonda’ on with an attached 3 year-old who has a propensity for finding the humor of you in your old stretched-out exercise pants?  It’s a little difficult to fully commit when you can sense him staring, a mixture of horror and awe written on his little face, as your jiggly bits move in rhythm to Richard Simmons sweatin’ his little shorts off.  Well, let’s just say it’s not easy.  And as far as savoring the beauty of an early morning?  I personally found that mid-morning has its own appeal. 

2)  I am tired of wearing my pajama pants and leisure bra until noon.  So, I’ve been a bit of a hypocrite over Christmas break.  You may be aware that my work-from-home hubby often wears nothing but his underpants until noon each and every day? (That’s right, his daily uniform…basically just a step up from his birthday suit.)   And I’ve been known to gripe about this situation a time or two.   Well, I’ve apparently adopted his mode of thinking because I’ve been wearing my pajama pants and leisure bra (read: no underwire, therefore not an attractive way to greet the UPS man) until around noon each day.  Don’t worry.  You don’t even have to say anything.  I’m ashamed of myself and plan on correcting this issue immediately.

3) I am tired of “stress” eating.  I have been eating frantically for almost the entire two weeks of Christmas break.  At first I thought I was just taking advantage of the holiday and indulging in goodies I knew were short-lived in their season.  But I quickly realized that I am drawn towards things like Cheez-its.  And Hot Tamales.  Now, last I checked, no one was “trolling the ancient Yuletide carol” while snacking down on Cheddar Jack crackers.  It’s called stress-eating, folks.  It’s called medicating oneself with sodium and artificial cheese while your two kids are fighting over their Zhu Zhu pets.  It’s called a bad habit.  It’s called stretched-out exercise pants.

4) I am ready to downsize kids for a less stressful day.  Again, I may have stumped you on this one.  You may be saying, “But, Mindy.  The primary source of your stress won’t be getting on the schoolbus.  He’ll still be home wreaking havoc and causing various bouts of destruction…all day long.”  True.  However, Avery is like supplying oxygen to Jack’s fire.  Her presence feeds his flame.   Alone, Jack is like a small little campfire.  Manageable but capable of mass destruction if left untended.  But with Avery, Jack is something akin to a forest fire of epic proportions.   Stress.  Lots of it.

5)  I want my “Days of our Lives” back.  During school days, in between folding laundry and cleaning the kitchen, there are brief respites in which I am able to sit down and watch a little television.  Not for very long periods, mind you, but just long enough to escape from my present and catch up on some much-needed televisual education.  Christmas break has all but eliminated this benefit from my day.  My kids have managed to suck any and all free time by frequent and sporadic emergent needs.   Just when I sit down to take a break someone requires a snack, or replacement batteries for a dead robot, or a pencil sharpener, or their head removed from the rungs of a chair, or a stiff drink (oops, that one’s me.)  One less child = slightly more time for Mindy and Days of Our Lives. 

Undoubtedly, I will miss having Avery home a little bit.  She supplies a whole lot of sunshine during these rainy, winter days, and her brother is absolutely in love with her.  But Jack and I will do just fine alone while she reconnects with her friends at school.   And, in a very short 998 days, Jack will join her.  Oy.

Mindy

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