Valentine’s Day

So, how did you celebrate Valentine’s Day? Was it a holiday filled with love, passion and romantic notions? Were there roses and little chocolate hearts gracing your bed pillow? Did your sweetheart whisper sweet-nothings into your ear pledging his or her undying devotion, romantic music playing in the background?

Yeah, mine was almost like that. Except take away the passion, notions, roses, chocolate and sweet nothings and substitute the romantic music for the sweet whir of Daytona racing. Ahhh…the romance.

I remember the days of Valentine’s past. The romance rangedanywhere from anonymous roses delivered in homeroom classto a slightly more mature holiday celebrated over a candlelit dinner with a spectacular view of the ocean. I’ve always loved this day but the meaninghas certainly changed for me overthe years. What began as a holiday centered solely on the flowers and candy has slowly evolved into a holiday centered solely on love.

For the first time in about twelve years of celebrating Valentine’s day with my husband I initiated a “no-gift” policy…and actually meant it. I will have to admit that I have actually previously verbalized my intentions of not wanting to exchange presents only to have changed my mind about 30 seconds after realizing that Jer actually took me seriously. Imagine mypoor bewildered husband standing in front of me with empty hands discovering that, yet again, he married a liar.And in subsequent years he learned to always have a gift at the ready, despite my insistance that they were entirely unnecessary. (Obviously, they were.)

But this year was very different. I suggested (yet again) that we save our money and not exchange gifts.

“Yeah, right,” Jer answered.

“I’m serious.”

“Uh, huh,” he says.

“No, really, Jer. We were just saying we needed to save a little money. We love each other. We know it. Let’s not do gifts.”

He looks at me sideways. “Okay. Are you serious? Is this going to be one of those situations where I listen to you and then I look like the big ass when I have nothing for you?”

“No, Jer. I am completely serious here. I do not need anything for Valentine’s Day. We’re good.”

“Al…right. I guess,” he says.

And, folks. I can tell he’s still not trusting me. About an hour later he comes back out from the garage and says, “Um, Mindy? I’ve been thinking about this whole ‘not get each other anything’ situation and I’m not sure about something.”

“What, Jer? What are you not sure of?” I ask, exasperated. We’ve already gone over this.

“I don’t believe you. Somehow I’m going to end up screwing this thing up and now I’m all worried about it.”

And this here was my defining moment. This was the pivotal point in time when I realized that Valentine’s Day has taken on a completely different meaning for me. Because listening to Jeremy and his “should I/shouldn’t I” struggle only reiterated to me that this year I was much more interested in simply spending the day together than opening little gift-wrapped heart-shapedjewelry boxes.

“Jeremy,” I began as I walked up and wrapped my arms around him. “I seriously do not want anything for Valentine’s Day. We need to save some money. I’d much rather just spend the day with you and the kids than waste a bunch of money on dinner out and gifts.”

And with that, he believed me. I woke up Valentine’s Day to absolutely nothing. And I’m actually okay with that.

Now, don’t misunderstand me here. If we ever get into the position wherespending money is of little consequence than you better believe I’ll be fully expecting a little somethin’-somethin’ awaiting my very anxious attention.

But, until then, I’llstay content with a hug from my (extremely paranoid)honey.

Happy Monday,



  1. says

    I’m honestly not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. I don’t know why. BUT, that being said, I got hubby the biggest bag of peanut m&m’s I could find, and he got me a planted tulip and some candy bars. The boys both got stuffed animals. We’re all happy, and not much money was spent. :)

  2. says

    Poor Jer, he was scared he was gonna get in big trouble. I dont have a sweetie but my mom gave me a lovely pot of tulips. I would rather have flowers, they dont need to be fancy. If I get chocolate I will snork up the whole thing in one setting anyway. Will we be hearing about your girls weekend?

  3. says

    We gave up on the gifts long ago too although Rich usually comes home with flowers for me and the kids.

    Which totally irritates me because why buy flower on the most expensive day of the year? Buy them on a random Tuesday and surprise me for Pete’s sake.

    I am an ungrateful wretch.

  4. says

    That is too cute that you hubby was in a sweat over it…you should have tricked him on Valentines for like 30 seconds, no I don’t think the poor guy couldn’ve taken it! I love this story!

  5. says

    That is SWEET and very smart too. :-)

    I think they says a lot about both of you.

    Our second Valentine’s together wasn’t a huge ordeal. I did wrangle a free hotel room but we just had grocery store sausage and crackers with red wine watching the Olympics. Awww. :-)

  6. says

    I have bucked against this holiday for at least 15 years now. I don’t want one day for us to show the other that we love them. That’s something that should happen the other 364 days of the year. I will not allow Bill to buy me anything for any occasion. And flowers, forget it! He’s been threatened with divorce if he buys me flowers! LOL And he knows I’m dead serious. But it did take some convincing, because like Jer, he just didn’t believe me. Not because I had anything to do with it, but because of the commercialism of the holidays shoving down his throat that he HAS to do something to show his love 1 day a year. Yeah, me and “Hallmark Holidays” don’t get along. 😉 It’s nice to see others who feel the same way, too!

  7. says

    Last year, money was the issue. This year, we had my fiance’s daughter until around 7 o’clock so we spent most of it with her…and that was fine. It was fun! We had some romantic time that night but by the time we’d dropped her off, we were EXHAUSTED! The last thing I wanted was a fancy dinner.

    Sometimes the best Valentine’s Days are the ones where you don’t have as much money…then you have to use your imagination.

  8. says

    I guess I’ll have to vote against the group on this one. I’m usually this very practical person, but I really love this day. I don’t need much, but chocolates are definitely in the right direction. And it seems there are so many things that can be done that don’t have to cost too much. Of course I also agree with others here that love can and should be shared on more than just one day a year. My husband downloaded into my itunes account a folder that said “for my valentine” and filled it with music by Beethoven (I’m obsessed about him right now). I thought that was about the sweetest thing ever because it showed to me that he knows me and cares. L’amore!

  9. says

    Poor guy, getting him all worked up and confused.

    We spent the day going to Home Depot and lunch with his mother for his b-day and Daytona 500. All in all it was a good day.

    Did you watch the race? What a race! For Jamie McMurry to win was awesome and for Dale to go from 10th to 2nd in one lap was the bomb!

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