So I’ve hit a bit of a weight loss plateau. The ‘Mohave Desert’ of plateaus, really. And naturally, my hubby the weightloss/fitness pro (so not) decided to impart on me his infinite wisdom.
“Mindy, you should totally mix things up a little bit. You need to try a different workout,” Jer explained.
“Jer, I always do different stuff. In fact, last night I did a Salsa dance workout. Do you know how hard that was? I had to have been dripping off the calories,” I said.
“Yeah, that’s all great and stuff but I think you should try something completely different, totally out of your comfort zone.”
Sigh. “Like what, Jer? Bull fighting? Fencing? Maybe barrel racing?”
“Um, no. I’m thinking you should try bike riding. Do the bark path at the park. I know it’s sure helped me up my fitness level,” Jer said, nodding his head.
Narrowing my eyes, I said, “Jer…you’ve ridden your bike, like,twice in the last three weeks. How can you honestly tell me that you’ve improved your fitness with bike riding?”
“Because I just feel better, in general. Plus, I plan on riding again really soon. Just, trust me. Try it. You’ll be shocked at how good it feels. Seriously,” Jer said. “You’ll love it.”
Okay, maybe he’s right. I should give this a try. Just possibly this is the shock my body needs toget going.
“Alright, Jer. You win. I’ll give it a whirl. Iused to love riding my bike.” When I was seven. But, given my propensity for getting bored really quickly, I was excited with the idea of somethingnew and different. I threwon some Lycra/Spandex pants, a sweatshirtand my tennis shoes.
Saying goodbye to Jer, I set out for the garage where my bicycle was awaiting me. I hopped on androde out of the garage, narrowly escaping a side swipe with the Expedition butalso exhilarated by the feel of the cool wind on my face and the warmth of the sun on my back. This was going to be really good. Really, really good.
I pedaled towards the bark path in the neighborhood park with a renewed spirit for fitness. I turned onto the path with verve and vigor andan energetic readiness to commune with nature.
And there is where the romance ended.
With each piece of bark my wheels rolled over my nether regions suffered a physical assault. My butt cheeks were screaming in protest at the sudden agony I had placed on them. I would shift a little to the left, shift a little to the right, attempting to ease the literal butt-slapping occuring with each bump of the road and rotation of the tire. I attempted to stop but that was even worse. Getting off the bike was harder than getting on. Each cheek was seizing into cramps, one right after the other, withevery step I took. So, I jumped right back on, determined to finish thistorture so I could go home and have a nice little chat with my hubby.
I can only imagine what I must have looked like rolling down that path towards home, hunched over the handlebars, sweat dripping from my determined face.
I managed to squeak out 30 minutes in agony before limping home. Gone was the exhilaration. Gone was the renewed spirit. Very much present was the bruised butt bone.
Folks, what I experienced was a new level of pain. Years of various exercises has gotten me sore feet, knees, quads, chest and arms. Thirty minutes on a bicycle got me a sore butt.
Rest assured, my butt has not been ultimately defeated. I’m not quite ready to give up thisidea of bike riding.As much as I hate to admit when Jer is right, in this case he kind of knew what he was talking about. Bruised buttocks aside,the bike ride most certainly did offer a newway to reach my desired fitness level.I will face this demon againbut next time will do so wearing padded underpants and loaded with Ibuprofren. And maybe a bigger bike seat.
Mindy
tinkerschnitzel says
Your poor butt! I’m afraid to get on a bike, since I haven’t been on one in ages. I’m sure mine will hurt just as bad.
A sure way to lose weight that my mom found: buy clothes you really like that fit perfectly. I swear every time she does, she loses more weight to the point she can’t wear the clothes she just bought. Seriously, she hasn’t looked this good in 20 years.
Lori says
Two years ago, due to what can only be described a fully psychotic break, I decided to do a triathlon. A little one, I was not, after all, fully institutionalized, but still…
I was worried about the running. I’ve never been able to run, my knees complain and my bosom needs industrial reinforcing.
I was worried about the swim. Although I’m fully comfortable getting knocked out of the boat and bobbing along till someone figures out how to get me back in, that’s not the same as actually moving – in a purposeful way – across some specified distance.
I was NOT worried about the bike. I can bike! I biked all over the place as a kid/teenager. I biked to buy groceries, to get to friends houses…I lived in a rural area. Biking was how I got from A to B.
Until I got ON the bike for the first time in *mumble mumble* years. And I thought – well and truly – that I had broken my butt in 19 places and I would never sit on a hard surface again.
It got better….slowly. But that is a pain like no other. And men don’t get that pain the same way. Just another in a long list of universal unfairnesses.
But major score for you! And I like the salsa dancing idea.
Mindee@ourfrontdoor says
A ha ha ha! This one time I exercised and lifted weights and the whole shebang for like a year and I thought I was in great shape. And then I got on the bike. Pure misery. Try a gel seat. It helps.
Spot says
Um…I don’t think barrel racing really burns that many calories. Unless you’re the horse. Which sounds like it would be no fun at all.
I can give no fitness advice because I’m the kind of girl who snacks while watching the biggest loser. All the while askind hubby “omigod! do I look like that?!”. To which he replies “of course not!”. Smart man. But I loved riding as a teenager and rode about 5 miles every day. I was in great shape and tight and toned way back then. =]
♥Spot
SuziCate says
I got a gel cushioned seat and it makes it much better, not that I actually ride my bike, but if I wanted to…….
Wendy says
I felt your pain at the words “ride the BARK path at the park”. I gave up riding bikes a long time ago because of the “butt pain” it is the worst. Kuddo’s to you for trying, maybe I will get inspired and try it again……or maybe not, haha.
Christina says
Seriously? By “bark” path, you do NOT mean that the trail was covered in, um…bark?! What you need, girl, is a pretty cruiser (that you can hang streamers from…and put on a little dingy bell) that you can mosey through the neighborhood on. And tell Jer to follow you in the truck because that’s what Matt did for me, my first outing. Those breezy downhills out were not so much fun on the way back.
Biking should not be a pain in the…eh-hem.
Angelia Sims says
New comfy seat cushion, padded shorts. And maybe a road???
I love riding my bike. I can’t wait til the time change when I can see at night to ride. I was up to 9 miles (side walk though). Then again that was 20 less pounds . Wonder if they have padded extensions for bike seats? I think I’m gonna need it!
Shelli says
I haven’t been on my bike in several years. Basically, my dizziness won’t let me. Hubby was talking about getting me one of those 3-wheelers, but it’s just a matter of money (and embarrassment at having to have 3 wheels LOL). The last time I was on my bike, I went ass over elbows over the handle-bars as I was trying to stop. Not a pretty sight! I felt so pathetic, since bike riding was my only way of getting around until I was 16.
I do remember seeing that they have extra padded, extra wide bike seats for sale. I would need one, too, so you’re not alone.
Marly says
Yes, bigger bike seat…and cushioned. You can even get cushioned pants to wear too. Look at it this way, you must be getting really skinny…that is why you need padding in the seat! 😉
Heather says
Ouch! I went ahead and put a bigger seat on my bike. I does make a huge difference.
Good luck!