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Robert the Cat

November 9, 2010 by Mindy 10 Comments

While perusing The Pioneer Woman this morning and reading her beautiful post detailing the close relationship between her and her Kitty Kitty I couldn’t help but be reminded of my non-existant relationshp with my own cat, Robert. For those who may need a recap, I have explained our decline in this post. The long and short of it is this: Robert’s a real jerk and hates us. The turncoat used our sympathy to bust him out of kitty jail and then proceeded to move out of our house, straightaway. He now lives with my next door neighbors and pretends we have no connection.

Soaking in the sun...outside. Away from us.

I had gotten quite used to his distance and reticence and until a couple of days ago managed to completely ignore his existence. Which is, after all, exactly what he wants.

But the other day something very, very strange happened. Something that has rocked my small world a bit. Something that I was not emotionally prepared for.

Sleeping on the lawn furniture...outside. Again, away from us.

I came home from grocery shopping and was in the process of attempting to unlock my car doors (another story for another post) when I looked up and saw Robert perched on my front porch, staring at me. Peering through my soul would more aptly describe his gaze. It was as if he was trying to convey a message that his status as a feline wouldn’t allow him to verbally express. It was as if he was trying to tell me “Thank you.”

Thank you for caring for animal-kind. Thank you for making the decision to adopt an older cat in a frisky kitty kind-of-world. Thank you for making the effort to break through my encumbered soul to form a relationship. Thank you for bringing me into your home and further, into your family. Thank you for loving me.

A very rare moment...cuddling with Lewis the dog...I think Robert was taking drugs.

I saw an opportunity which I hadn’t ever been allowed before. Robert and I were going to connect. And even more than that, he wanted to.

I set my groceries down and approached my wayward cat, reaching my hand out with loving care. Robert looked at my proffered hand and my excitement was electric. I had my cat back, for that I was sure.

He lowered his ears, closed his eyes and then proceeded to…hiss at me and manage a jump of epic proportions from my porch. I flipped around to see where Robert landed only to find him nose-deep in my rhododendron bush, in hunting mode.

It was then that I realized my cat wasn’t trying to connect with me at all. There was no gratitude pouring out of his soul. There was no desire for a relationship with his savior. There was no attempt at reconciling an unrequited love.

He was stalking his prey. And I had been in the line of fire.

I noticed this morning that Robert is back in his place of choice, the neighbor’s wicker porch furniture, snuggled deeply in his wool blanket. I attempted eye contact with him only to be shot down with a slight glance. It was over.

Jerk.

Mindy

Filed Under: Everyday Stuff Tagged With: adopted cats, pets, Robert, the suburban life

Comments

  1. Tinkerschnitzel says

    November 9, 2010 at 8:57 AM

    I hate it when kitties do this to us. Mine are much nicer now that they’re fixed, but they’re all still pretty alouf.

    Reply
  2. Mindee@ourfrontdoor says

    November 9, 2010 at 9:12 AM

    That is so sad!

    Reply
  3. Wendy says

    November 9, 2010 at 9:34 AM

    I did not even know you had a cat, haha. Ours has taken up residencey at 3 different residences…ours and the duplex across the street,,, both renters have assumed possession of our wayward cat, but my daughter has yet to let go….the difference between our Bizmark, and your Robert… Bizmark is soaking it up where ever he can, he eats at all three houses, sleeps at all three houses and has convinced all three houses that he is loyal to only them and is loved by all three houses. One of the renters asked us the other day if we were “really attached to Bizmark (she calls him BB), because if we weren’t “attached” she loves him so much and would be happy to take him with her when she moves in a couple weeks! McKenzie was very quick to tell her we were VERY attached to him….. But in the meantime, he is milking it for all it is worth! Good luck with Robert, we have had cats like him in the past and you just want to shake them into realizing all you have done for them,,,sometimes they can be sooo ungrateful 🙂

    Reply
  4. SuziCate says

    November 9, 2010 at 9:38 AM

    Dang, what a tease! That’s why I prefer dogs…my cats have their own “conditions”! I’m the only one around here allowed to be moody!

    Reply
  5. Betty says

    November 9, 2010 at 10:00 AM

    At least you don’t have a crazy cat lady in your neighborhood hoarding cats. I had a sweet orange tabby girl who was lured by the temptation of fresh red snapper left on the porch. When confronted crazy lady, I accused her of cat thievery…but there was no getting the turncoat back and its been 10 years. That is another reason (besides asthma) that I haven’t replaced my late Queen Tut who was a big part of my life for 18 years 🙁

    Reply
  6. christina says

    November 9, 2010 at 12:09 PM

    Those kitties are a little nuts sometimes. They can reject you and make you feel like crap. LOl

    Reply
  7. Marly says

    November 9, 2010 at 1:45 PM

    I have this theory that cats were never really meant to be domesticated. Whereas dogs can be completely at the mercy of their owners, cats are so much more elusive. At least the cats I have had in my life have been that way. I’ve given up on them. I’m a dog person through and through. Although I have to admit Robert is kinda cute…

    Reply
  8. Lori @ In Pursuit of Martha Points says

    November 9, 2010 at 3:30 PM

    And I can’t get my cats off of me.

    It’s like there’s a magnet there.

    An annoying magnet.

    A magnet that attracts annoying things.

    At least you were not the ACTUAL prey.

    Reply
  9. Unrequited Love says

    November 9, 2010 at 8:12 PM

    Hahaha – you were in the line of fire! Well, cats, what can we do? They’re probably the most snobbish beings on earth, and if they’d be humans, they’d be the kind that walks around dressed in Prada, Gucci and a constant bubble of superiority, looking down on everyone else, and, at occasional generous moments, even smile at them not just so that they are admired for their beauty, but to actually make another person feel good. You know, the exception that proves the rule…

    Reply
  10. Angelia Sims Hardy says

    November 10, 2010 at 11:38 AM

    Have you tried bribing him with pounce? Maybe a tuna can peace offering? Cat nip?
    Surely he has a breaking point!!

    😀

    Reply

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