Last week, I posted a few of the strangest (and someslightly disturbing) keywords searched on Google resulting in random visits to my blog. It has yet tocease to amaze me that 1) not only are people searching for somepretty off-the-wall results, but 2) somehow the ‘brain’ at Google connects them to me.
Now, I’ve been known to key in a few weird search words myself, such as, “toddler poop willful attitude,” or “dog sleeping with husband”which have undoubtedly shown up on someone’s Google Analytics account. But here are a few that landed in my account and left me saying, ‘huh?”
1) Book:Mindy Superhero Fly – Now this one spooks me a little because I’m pretty sure that word of my superheroism has spread and perhaps someone is ‘googling’ me in hopes ofextendingan invitation to the Justice League. I’m quite certain there is a growing need for my mad skills and lightning speed reflexes. This just might be my time to shine.
2) Calvin and Hobbes Hammering Nails into the Table – Huh? I’m racking my brain here and cannot come up with a single reason someone would be directed to my site withthese keywords. I think Google is messing with me. Perhaps they’re anti-Justice League and are trying to throw me off my game. Your little plan won’t work, Google. Or is that evenyour real name?
3) Glad I’m Not a Man Feminist- Now, what exactly might a man feminist be? A man sympatheticto the feminist movement? A feminist sympathetic to the male movement? A manly feminist? A feminist man? If you’re out there googler, please contact me. I must know your purpose.
4) Mozzarella Sticks Bowel Movement – Whoa, doggie. I’ll have to admit I’ve had a cheese stick or two which succeeded in wreaking havoc on my digestive system. And lucky me, the gurgly tummy tends to flare up at parties. Parties not located at my house. Which leads me to wonder, was this a person frantically looking for some answers? Had their party-driven snack fest resulted in a little extra-curricular time on the commode and this wasa panicked search from the iPhone during their 3rd trip to the bathroom?Imagine their major disappointment when they were directed to this post. Hope they got out of there okay.
5) Toga Boobs – Again with the boobs. Now, if I’m to join the Justice League I will have to address this issue. I want, no, I need to be taken for the serious superhero that I am. I will not be reduced to a mere sex symbol. Yes, I have boobs. And, yes, I have worn a toga. But I’m so much more than that. It’s time that people stop focusing on my ladies and start focusing on my gifts. This had better be the last ‘boob’ search I come across.
So, there you have it. Another brief glimpse into the minds of those who have visited my blog, albeit for some it was most likely a shortstay.(So sorry cheese-lover.)
The Lumberjack's Wife says
So strange . . . . I wonder how your blog comes up in some of those searches. 🙂
Google analytics just sounds like so much fun. I need to go waste some time there. I mean who knows what kind of weirdos are perusing my blog??!
PS~ I’m totally contacting you later about the justice league. You don’t mind wearing a skimpy costume right? Or being called Boober Woman??
Toga boobs, huh? Yup, sounds like my mom’s superhero name.
I was thinking ‘Lady Ladies’ would be a cool superhero name. Or, ‘Ladies Woman.’ Or, any variation on “Toga Girl/Woman/Broad/Chick” would also work.
Also go here (if this link works): http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=4309784&id=686549788
This was one of my Christmas presents this year (hand-made by my mother’s gentleman). I’ll loan it to you if you like!
Huh? I dont know what to make of this. Maybe you have a secret life even you dont know about.
Now are the mozzarella sticks bowel movement and toga boobs connected…sounds like a frat party gone bad!!!
apparently your boobs are just too amazing to pass up!!!
LOVE it! especially -mozzarella sticks bowel movement !!!
that is too funny!
I think I can solve the mystery on the Calvin and Hobbes one. I think I responded to one of your posts noting this as my favorite cartoon. I think there was something you said once about your son and it reminded me of this cartoon. I guess these search engines also include user comments. Actually, this is really helpful because I’ve had some weird ones on my my google analytics too. Now I get it!
I’m going to have to check this google analytics out. Then again, I’m kinda scared to.
Seems like your “ladies” are a hit!