I think children are supremely underrated as sources of intelligent thought. So often we dismiss their nonsensical chatter as just that…nonsense. The last couple of days I’ve spent some time actually listening to the words that come out of my kids’ tiny little mouths and have been amazed at what has come flowing from their pure intellects. I thought I might impart on you, my fellow friends, these little pearls of wisdom so that you may experience a smidge of the enlightenment infusing itself throughout this suburban household.
- Don’t eat all the candy, momma. Just eat one. You’ll get an ache in your tummy. ~ Jackson
I’m not, traditionally, a big candy eater but have a particular hankering for Hot Tamales. They burn my tongue and satisfy my sweet tooth all at once. Love them. A lot. Jack has noticed. He’s worried. And, he’s right. They do give me an “ache in my tummy” (and, unfortunately, a dimple in my thighs.)
- We shouldn’t lie, mom. It make’s it too hard to remember the truth.” ~Avery
Avery is in the first grade and by all rights this should make her a “liar, liar, pants on fire”. However, I’ve noticed that she’s not very gifted at it. One tilt of my head and a questioning gaze in her direction brings her melting to the ground in a pool of her own lies, truth spewing from her mouth at alarming rates. She has learned, early on I must say, that it is much easier to start with the truth because the “melting in lies” process is tedious and energy-draining. (Disclosure: Her tendency towards honesty is not 100% fool-proof and I am not kidding myself in thinking that she will never lie to me. I am, however, fully confident that I will catch her in them. Every. Single. Time.)
- Turkeys have feet. Cows have feet. Garbage cans have wheels. ~ Jackson
Wow. I’m really trying to open my mind to the hidden genius in this statement. I know it’s there. It’s just taking some time to reveal itself.
- I’m pretty sure the neighbor stares at us at night. ~ Avery
Ahhh. At first thought, I interpret this to mean that we are all products of our own judgment. The “neighbor” is a metaphor for our own paranoia at being exposed for our inadequacies. “Night” being a metaphor for the point in time our character craves to undergo a complete renewal process, as our bodies are allowed with each sleep. At second thought, I realized that Avery is not that enlightened and truly believes our neighbor stares at us at night. And, I think she might be right as our broken window blinds affords him the perfect opportunity. Creepy. (Edited to add for reassurance: The kids have never actually seen our neighbor stare at us, they are just assuming that our bright picture window open for the world to see would be far too much enticement for the neighbor to resist. I have to say, I am often thinking the same thing while doing my evening workouts…the sole reason I have opted out of jumping jacks. He doesn’t deserve that.)
So, there you have it: some little jewels of wisdom to help us navigate our way through the perilous journey of life. Start listening to the little ones around you, folks. They are much wiser than their germ-infested, slightly selfish, unconditional loving, slapstick-humored, snotty little selves let on.
I am laughing and yet also impressed with the insight here.
But you need to move.
I edited my post as I realized after reading your comment I painted out my neighbor as a potential pedophile. Have no reason to believe that. The hangup is entirely ours. As usual. 🙂
Hmmm…Avery might be pointing out that your neighbor is creepy. Not sure what Jackon is implying other than the obvious -Turkeys have feet. Cows have feet. Garbage cans have wheels …wow, I could spend way too much time trying to figure that one out. Thanks for the chuckle, love the things kids come up with!
I quickly wanted to edit my post to clarify my neighbor’s part in all this. He’s done everything possible to create a physical barrier between our close suburban houses. We really have no proof that he stares at us…just paranoia on our parts, particularly when I’m outfitted in Spandex and attempting jumping jacks. Highlighted by overhead lighting, it’s like watching a train wreck. He probably can’t help himself. 🙂
Lori @ In Pursuit of Martha Points says
My neighbor plays piano at 6 in the morning. She spent a few mornings anxiously checking in with us to make sure we weren’t being bothered. Totally not.
But I wonder what insight would come from that: “The neighbor is serenading us.” or “The neighbor is throwing music at us.”
My kids are teenagers. They mostly think they’re smarter than we are anyway. Therefore we don’t listen.
Oh, teenagers don’t count in my theory. Somewhere around 13 they suddenly get hit with the dumb stick. It isn’t until they’re well into their twenties they start to make logical sense again. 🙂
Fattie Fatterton says
LOL, this was so cute. Ahhh kidlings.
The Lumberjack's Wife says
I’m pretty sure the neighbor stares at me at night!
Warning! Warning! 🙂
I am pretty sure kids have a lot more going on than we realize. When my nephew was about 4 he casually patted my rear end and stated “Its okay to have a big butt”. Then went about his business. I am now scared for life.
Angelia Sims says
Kids are unfiltered with truth nuggets. I heard Jason’s almost four-year old spout off “What the crap. ”
I thought exactly. Lol.
How very wise and so sweet to be trying to look out for your tummy!
I think it might be time to buy or make some curtains!